Martina's Gift

I never used to consider myself so lucky, no, so immensely blessed...until I started reflecting on the life and times of my grandmother, who passed on early this year.

Martina is one person who instilled on me the value of hard work. I still think about her a lot, not because she was just my grandma, but for all the values she stood for. I think I have all these blessings in my life because of her.

Every morning, she would wake up before dusk, just to say her prayers and recite her litanies...growing up in the Catholic tradition, she instilled in the whole family good work ethics, the spirit of giving and especially to the needy and most importantly, always to pray and thank God for his gifts. I am indeed truly thankful for her gifts.

It was just the other week when I stumbled upon the story of a Ugandan woman whom the press nicknamed "bad black". The part that got me intrigued was that she was convicted of having squandered money from a company that she co-owned with a British partner. This reminds me of so many instances I see of my fellow women folk, one of them being my own mum. They are so eager to spend money they have not earned! Thank God for lessons from my dear grand-mum, I have never paid rent from money I did not earn, nor do I depend on handouts from men....I think this is the hallmark of being independent, one of those rights that women fought so hard to earn, and some, e.g in Saudi Arabia, are still fighting to earn. Being independent is not just being able to drive your own car, that you bought with your money, but, being able to provide for your self and your family, not being a pest that squanders other people's hard earned cash.

I was listening to some "girl gossip" recently....the discussion was on some lady who had got herself a diplomat of a boyfriend....the girl apparently used to live in an apartment in up-market Nairobi where the rent was like 70k per month. And then she bore this diplomat some "twins"..., from the discussants points, the girl should have meekly played housewife, and ensured she had a house in her own name, to continue enjoying the perks provided by the diplomat, some black Muslim guy from a West African country.

Apparently she was not the main squeeze - she enjoyed the status of what Kenyans call "clande". Now what she did wrong from the point of view of the gossipers - she actually still continued hanging around Westlands with "Umoja girls" waiting for "handouts" of course after granting "favours" to "mzungu" men. And when the diplomat found out, this girl got kicked out of the house, and thus, the big fall from grace to grass...since she now had to move back to "shags."

Girls, girls, girls, why can't you just work to earn your own living?

I still thank God for the lessons from my dear Grand-mum Martina.